Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
