So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
