she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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