she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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