i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Randomize
