Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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