Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
