Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
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