I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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