from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
