physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Houston, we have a squirter
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize