every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
