yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
