All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
