Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
