Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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