A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
it hurts more in the daytime
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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