Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
they're like a gay fantastic four
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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