My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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