some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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