I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
