Swine flu. Run for my life!
oh god the rape fog is back!
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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