is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Randomize
