two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
