i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
