is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
My life is pants optional.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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