apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
