How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
