i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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