ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
