anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
