i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
