I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
