So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
