I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
