i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Alive.
So much puke
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
