I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
