Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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