I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Farmville is her only friend.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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