you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
