the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
