I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Randomize
