I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize