girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
