no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Text me some of your sweat
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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