Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
