It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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