CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Randomize
