I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
