god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
